A Jewish woman goes to France at the request of her pregnant daughter. The mother arrives just as her daughter is going into labor. Everyone is frantic and nervous, as this is the daughter’s first delivery. The mother, however is cool as a cucumber.
Suddenly, the daughter cries out, “Mon Dieu!” The doctor races up to her and says “Push!” The mother pulls him aside and says, “She’s not ready yet.” Sure enough, things calm down for a while.
Later, the daughter again screams, “Mon Dieu!” The doctor looks ot the mother who says, “Nope. She’s still not ready.” And again, things settle down.
Later still, the daughter is heard moaning, “Oy Vey!” The mother smacks the doctor and says, “What are you standing around for, you schmendrick? Can’t you hear that she’s ready?”