Tag: money
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5282Joke no. Classic joke · No. 5282
Obviously a Jewish Mother
A teenager lost a contact lens while playing basketball in his driveway. After a fruitless search, he went inside and told his mother the…
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5299Joke no. Classic joke · No. 5299
Getting it Down to the Basics
Little Morris, 4 years old, walked down the beach, and as he did, he spied a matronly woman sitting under a beach umbrella on…
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5306Joke no. Classic joke · No. 5306
It Always Comes Back
A rabbi was making his rounds to his congregational members on a bicycle, when he came upon a little boy trying to sell a…
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5317Joke no. Classic joke · No. 5317
Shabbos Ends Quickly in Williamsburg
A man crosses Bedford Ave in Williamsburg, ON SHABBOS, when he sees a pack of money. With a rubber band around it...HUNDRED DOLLAR BILLS!…
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5319Joke no. Classic joke · No. 5319
Synagogue names
The new marketing strategy of targeting groups has finally reached synagogues.... Some of the new congregations follow: For Gay Congregations - B'nei Feggela For…
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5322Joke no. Classic joke · No. 5322
I Understand, part III
Members of the Orthodox women's Shul Sisterhood were concerned because a widowed Shul member and her three small daughters were staying away from services.…
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5324Joke no. Classic joke · No. 5324
A classic
Two brothers, identical twins, joined a shul and decided to take out only one subscription and that each would go on alternate weeks and…
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5326Joke no. Classic joke · No. 5326
Chasid, be Careful in Texas
A big burly young Chasid from the Mea Sha'arim ultra Orthodox area went to America to schnoor money. As he travel around the country…
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5351Joke no. Classic joke · No. 5351
Modern Jewish Proverbs
"Truth is the safest lie." "Just as courage imperils life, fear protects it." "He who puts up with insult invites injury." "God could not…
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5358Joke no. Classic joke · No. 5358
Jewish Modesty
A Catholic, a Protestant, a Muslim and a Jew were in a discussion during a dinner. Catholic: "I have a large fortune....I am going…
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5360Joke no. Classic joke · No. 5360
When there is a Will, there is a Wave
The lawyer was reading out the Will of Sam Rosenblatt, a rich man, to those people mentioned in the Will: "To my loving wife…
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5361Joke no. Classic joke · No. 5361
Yachta, Yachta, Yachta
Goodman was a moderately successful stockbroker who dreamed of making the big money someday. He took his friend out for a drive, and he…
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5362Joke no. Classic joke · No. 5362
Check and Cheeky
When the heir to the Rothschild fortune visited a poor Jewish village near Budapest, the locals poured out to greet him. With all due…
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5364Joke no. Classic joke · No. 5364
The Best Lawyer Joke Ever
A lawyer and an elderly Hasidic man are sitting next to each other on a long flight. The lawyer is thinking that Hasidim are…
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5367Joke no. Classic joke · No. 5367
Eight days to remove it
An observant Jew who lived on Park Avenue, built a Sukkah on his balcony. Some of his 'high society' non-Jewish neighbors brought him to…
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5381Joke no. Classic joke · No. 5381
Rx
At his wife's insistence, Goldberg finally went to his doctor for a check up. "You look terrible," said the doctor. "Do you drink?" "Why…
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5382Joke no. Classic joke · No. 5382
Confidential Info
Our rabbi announced that admission to one of our shul's social events would be seven dollars ($7) per person. "However," he said, "if you're…
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5394Joke no. Classic joke · No. 5394
Morris the Card Player
All evening long four cardplayers had been pestered by Morris, a self-proclaimed genius who commented on everyone's poker hand and style of play. When…
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5403Joke no. Classic joke · No. 5403
21st Century Synagogue Rabbi
"Will everyone please turn on their tablet, PC, iPad, smart phone, and Kindles to Art Scroll page 232. And please switch on your Bluetooth…
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5425Joke no. Classic joke · No. 5425
Hillary, the adaptable candidate
(from a speech given recently) Ladies of Hadassah. Let me start by saying how nice it is to be among mishpoche. I'm reminded of…
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5431Joke no. Classic joke · No. 5431
Cut, Cut, Cut
A chassid walks into a tiny restrauant and reads the menu. Flaffel $2.00 Blintzes $4.00 Complete bris $10.00 The chassid walks over to the…
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5443Joke no. Classic joke · No. 5443
The Test
An old rabbi had a teenage son and he wanted to see what the boy would be like when he grew into a man.…
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Yeshivish
Help a kollel guy out
Sorry folks, just got out of the woods. Boston Dave sent this over. Find out more on 4torah.com