I must give a big yasher koach to Dov Bear who somehow found this crazy video, that basically shows an off the derech kid (I kid you not, the kid wearing a knitted yarmulke is supposed to be the bum!) who is disowned by his father and eventually dies. The video is so insanely behind the times, that I found myself in an uncontrollable laughing fit for much of it. Frummies really believe this crud!
Just because a kid wants to be more “modern” than the way you raised him doesn’t mean he’s going off or as the frummies say “at risk” at which point they lump and sometimes place this kid who merely wanted to be a little more normal than his chassidish or yeshivish parents into a program with a bunch of real drug addicts and other folks who need real help, not a bunch of former druggies turned kiruv rabbi telling them why frumkeit will keep them off of drugs. Oh and off the derech kids rarely don a knitted yarmulke and knitted yarmulke wearers are much less likely to be off the D than black velvet yarmulke wearers.
Devora from Facebook says that the Still Your Child music video takes its inspiration from the That 70’s Show skit on Marijuana.
I thought this was really sad and the truth is it made me tear up, but that’s probably just because I’m a sentimental sap. I hope it will make one person really think before they decide to boot their OTD kid out of the house.
It definitely should have people cry, but the laughing was because it’s total insanity to me and I know dozens of people whop would watch this and nod their heads in agreement.
bet you dont know anyone that would watch this and nod in agreement- its total horse shite. there can only be 1 or 2 nut jobs in the world who would not piss them selves laughing while watching this
this video made me sick
This video is one of the most disgusting things that I have seen come out of Charedistan recently.
if you see any other sick ones, please send them my way.
The beginning of this is pathetic and incredibly unrealistic, but I gotta admit I teared up towards the end. Maybe that’s just because I have so many close friends in rehab and boot camp now, after being kicked out of their yeshivish or chassidish homes. Hell, I was almost kicked out of my house! I’ve never touched a drug in my life! My big, unforgivable sin is that I left yeshiva at 18 to work, so I can actually have my own life instead of feeding off other people’s accomplishments and money.
Oh, and I also left because I was screwed by the system (if you call getting beaten up by rebbeim; once to the extent that I needed stitches on my head screwed by the system).
you guys make it sound like the only kids in the world who r on drugs or in boot camp r kids who got kicked out of their yeshivish chasidish homes. Now that is something to laugh about, truth is most kids arent kicked out till their on drugs already. I had a 17 YR old boy (OTD) move into my house lived here for 3 yrs and i can definitely understand his parents kicking him out, you gotta put yourself in their shoes and feel the pain
If you want to think like that, maybe start a little farther back. Maybe if they wouldn’t feel so uncomfortable skipping minyan or wanting to go to a ‘lower class’ yeshiva or smoking or a myriad of other things that every normal boy wants to do, they wouldn’t feel the need to turn to things like drugs and sex.
Better they should be chasing girls than smoking cigarettes.
What normal boy would want to smoke? Where I went to high school the only people who smoked cigarettes were from trailer parks.
Perhaps the Charedim, along with dressing like they live in the 17’th century, also treat their children as if they are in that century – as property.
Bingo. Chochma bagoyim. Enlightenment helps sometimes.
I laughed so hard, I was crying. The best scene is where he is smoking and then suddenly grips his chest and falls to the sidewalk and then the fade to the cancer center. I can’t even believe this kind of obscene propaganda. I’m also disturbed that an actual hospital let them film this drek.
those homeless people have awfully nice hoodies
LOL! Better than I own!
Wow. So some Charedim really ARE crazy after all…I love it when they stress ESPN zone and times square. H-I-L-A-R-I-O-U-S.
OMG- the kid gets lung cancer from one puff of one cigarette… and it’s the worst lung cancer ever… just attacks him there out of nowhere and kills him. LOL. Wow. Sheesh. no words.
who says was one puff of one cigarette?
I’m undecided. Is the message that going off the derech kills, or that abandoning your kid despite rebellion kills?
“The crying father at the end, the “i hope you forgive me lyrics,” and the title of the song: “I’m still your son”, have me leaning toward the latter…
in which case, apart from the use of the worse-case-scenario stereotypes, I dont understand the criticism.
I dont understand the criticism.
How about first and foremost portraying a kid with a kippah serugah (a big one at that) as being OTD? as being a druggie? as sleeping on the street?
How about portraying a kid that sits on a counter, talks on the phone, and drinks beer, as being a kid worthy of kicking out of the house?
Those don’t strike you as being worth criticism?
Of course thats worth criticism but that doesnt happen (except in some very rare cases) this is pure anti charedi propaganda which some are to eager to believe. Im going to say something contraversial and that is, to ultra charedim a child going off the D is a bigger tragedy than it may be to others, hence some of u dont understand their reaction
you are an idiot.
look who produced the video…
“anti charedi propaganda” – truly pathetic….
i dont get all the criticism either.
the video is hilarious – but at least someone tried!
there are complaints when charedim do nothing to protect these kids who get rejected by their families, and now there are complaints when someone tries to do something to stop it.
i understand that the video is ridiculously exagerated, but i think its great that someone is making an effort to sensitize the community! why not commend them for making an effort rather than criticize?
i agree with you, i appreciate the effort. i think this video is talking to “super frummies” (who ironically will probably never see it) and thats why it seems so silly to others. i know very frum families that do think their child drinking beer and dressing differently is a tragedy. as much as i don’t agree with that mentality, you can only reach them by addressing their way of thinking. and of course the way he died didn’t make sense, but i think that wasn’t the point; the point is to drive home the idea that your son is always your son, don’t wait until he dies to realize that.
the one thing i’m slightly offended by is the kippa sruga. i am “black hat”/ “black velvet kippa” and i think there is an underlying idea here that wearing a kippa sruga is off the derech. so although this movie is trying to teach tolerance and acceptance, it still has a lot to learn itself…
I think us as jews is spoiled to think that a kid like this is considered “Of Derik”.
Damn, you white boys neva been to the hood, have you?!!!!!!
Over there “Of the Derik” mean yo kid go all gangsta and sh*t. Meanin yo kid join a gang and do hardcore sh*t like murder, rape and robbery and muggin.
Heck that kid still wearin a bennie and at least his friend was a peacefull hippie.
When a kid in the hood rebels……Deamn, you don’t even wanna walk on the same side of the street cause you be afraid you gettin mugged!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
You guys don’t got a clue!!!!!!
The kid in the video there is lines he won’t cross(notice in the video he neva raped,murdered or robbed)!!!!
“The kid in the video there is lines he won’t cross(notice in the video he neva raped,murdered or robbed)!!!!”
I think it was pretty clearly implied.
lol! how was it implied? by his knitted white kippa?
BTW: that is not a knit kipa, the proper term is crochet.
LOL!
I’m a little surprised that the frum community doesn’t get more upset about this. We judge moderate muslims for not stepping up to their fundamentalist brethren. If so, why don’t we confront the terrorists in our own communities who are responsible for this sort of inhumane child abuse? While this video is certainly laughable, it shouldn’t end there. I’d rather join a open-minded church that walk into these chareidi shuls.
I am what you might call a “frummy”.
I do not know anyone who would associate with what is depicted in this video.
I highly doubt it was made by anyone from my community.
It was made by Shmuel Borger, an alleged child molester who is still employed to make videos for the Chofetz Chaim Heritage Foundation, a prominent organization within the frum community.
no way!!!
Really??? That’s complete insanity.
Yeah. Frumfollies has a whole section on this @sshole going back to his days as a Jewish boys choir master. Someone should kill this guy.
Oh my gosh. :^O
What are you shocked at?
That this movie was apparently made by a child molester! That is just plain awful!
Then again considering Roman Polanski is still running around loose to this day maybe it should not be so shocking, but I don’t understand why this well-known or at least widely-rumored molesters are still running around with no charges brought and no public outrage. :^(
He’s the father of the choson who “fell” over his hotel room balcony on his wedding night.
I don’t know. Probably because the frum community is stuck in an 18th century, ghetto mentality that prevents the police from getting involved. Also, they don’t want to advertise their problems because it’s “a chilul hashem”. They’re so afraid of admitting any mistakes, they’ll sacrifice their own children.
Someone said a smart thing: If you shine a light, the roaches scatter. But they multiply and fester in the dark. That seems to be the state of most organized religion today.
No wonder, I found the video quite “touching”.
What’s wrong with working at 18 ??????
I’ve been wondering this for a while.
it is bittul torah, and will eventually lead one down the path of avodah zarah and giluy arayos. possibly shfichas damim too. it starts small, by getting a job, but don’t underestimate the work of the satan. first he tells you “get a job, its the normal way to live” and if you listen to that, you will be opening the door to listening when he says “murder this young child, but first sodomize him.”
Haha lol!
I always miss the small print about Molekh worship on job applications.
alright maybe i am a naive out of towner, but what kind of parent would actually physically force their kid out of the house?
and it was unclear why the kid died- was it the cigarette? the one cigarette?! practically all the boys in yeshiva in israel smoke.
the jewish kids who are ‘at risk’ are driven to deserve this tittle because of parents who dont fully comprehend the concept of parenting.
didn’t take the time to read all the comments, so I’m sorry if someone already said this, but the skit from that 70’s show was a parody of an actual movie made in the fifties called Reefer Madness. It’s a pretty ridiculous fabrication made by people who had little to no actual experience with the drug, but it is fun for a laugh. As long as you remember how grossly inaccurate it is. But I don’t think the people who made this video, actually watch that 70s show. I highly doubt it.
Thank you Miri. Pending moderation, I posted a link at the bottom of this page to the movie itself. My friends and I used to watch it while baked (it’s that funny). I just took one look at Kelso (Ashton Kutcher) sitting in that chair laughing uncontrollably, I knew it just had to be “Reefer Madness”, which I could not believe at first was a serious attempt at propaganda.
I sometimes think that my parents take that movie literally. :p
I doubt mine have ever seen it, but they might as well have. When they found out I was smoking, that was almost it for me. My father says he never has, somehow I don’t believe him.
Have you ever seen “Pineapple Express?” If not, you gotta see the first scene in the movie, a fictionalized account on why Marijuana was probably illegalized to begin with.
My dad actually did a little, in college; but somehow it seems to make him crazier about it. I have seen that movie (James Franco is brilliant, so is Seth Rogen) but I don’t remember that scene. I may have missed the beginning. But there are entire documentaries on why weed was made illegal. Mostly, it had to do with racism, and the abolitionist void after alcohol was made legal again.
My reply has been misappropriated to the bottom of the page. I posted 2 versions of the scene in Pineapple Express.
This video was terrible and upsetting. Is this the famous video that was made / sponsored by the father’s whose son killed himself after his wedding? What can you learn from it? The Dad drove his son to his death and then feel bad.
Didn’t that kid kill himself after he admitted to his wife that he had been molested as a kid?
lighten up a little it shouldnt be hard to get that for a charedi kid, wearing a kipa seruga and hanging out in times square IS off the derech, he left the path he has been raised in, is it as bad as no kipa? obviously not, so what?
That being said the video was very stupid
Can you please tell us what it feels like to spend your entire life with your mind trapped in a tiny 2×2 in. box?
it feels exactly like being too close-minded to put things in perspective and just jumping up and down looking for thing s to mock when they may not be there
Was this filmed in the 90s. Where do you find working payphones in subways now?
At least one at Kew Gardens-Union Turnpike.
This has been out for a couple years, but always merits a good chuckle. Some food for thought, as I see that many commentators are put off by the video… The chareidim who make such videos are not saying that the kid is OTD because he wears a kippa seruga or smokes a cigarette. Rather, those two things (as examples which we all know are ridiculous) are about as far as the movie makers can go in expressing themselves…without becoming black sheep themselves. They DO know that the behaviors out there engaged in by many stereotypical OTD kids are much more risque dangers–but they simply cannot show that stuff without being flamed themselves. So instead they use idiotic crap like this, symbolically, for their naive and ignorant audience to show that the kids are “at-risk”. The *intended* message for the neanderthals in BP, Williamsburg, etc is “don’t throw your kids out of the house.” It’s supposed to be prevention–for the parents. I’m not sure if the ends justify the means, nor do I agree with their production…but a small attempt at putting things in perspective.
that sounds better, and more in touch with reality.
Embarrassingly for us “frummy associated”, that’s how it goes. I actually know a woman, who back in her day was involved in writing/directing those awful and tacky Bais Yaakov fundraiser plays and slideshows. A while ago, she was contacted by some old friends to help them in making an actual live action film for that BY crowd (revolutionary, as they only do plays usually). Anyway, she was cast as a chiloni Israel woman….and the people making the movie were stuck with the problem as how to portray her to the audience as non-observant–after all, she can’t (nor would she) chas v’shalom dress untzniusly!! Bkitzur, I kid you not, they decided that her character will wear SUNGLASSES (even in night scenes) and that’s how the inclusive sheltered audience will identify her as chiloni. The anecdote would have rubbed me the wrong way when I was younger, but it is just so damn funny, not gonna get hung up on their stupidity
Not to be nitpicky, but did you mean “risky dangers”? I’m sure the OTD kids are involved in some risque things, too– but I don’t think that those are necessarily dangerous.
chemy that was some rat poison in that dub huh, yo & dis bs who is wearing a kippa anyone who is otd wouldn’t wear nuff’n
he should a been kill’d from a drive by after a crack deal gone bad or something
Just so you know, that clip from “That ’70s Show” was actually inspired by the 1936 propaganda piece “Reefer Madness”, also known as “Tell Your Children”. This movie is the original anti-marijuana propaganda. As you can see by the parody, it was so ridiculous, that NORML actually bought the rights to it and currently has yearly screenings of it. Most modern audiences seeing it today have trouble believing that this was actually meant to be taken seriously. So yes, this movie is so indicative of the government’s half-baked efforts to combat marijuana use, that NORML just had to get on it.
For those interested in just how bad this movie is, here’s a link to the entire 80 minute film
http://www.hulu.com/watch/63039/reefer-madness
Ok. That was pathetic. One smoke and it is cancer for sure!
I think that the parents are to blame on this one (and yes, I am a parent of a lovely young woman who is now married with a child of her own)
No way would there be anything that would cause me to throw my daughter out of the house. If she had a problem, then we would seek appropriate help. But to cut her off?
That was MY mother’s generation, I think.
that was the message of the video, .
I agree one puff was ridiculous, the video shouldve gone on for decades as he smokes pack after pack, then it is cancr for sure. right?
The video should’ve had him overdose on pills. Most realistic option here, in my opinion.
my parents cut me off for being OTD…they didn’t kick me out of the house as a teenager, but I haven’t gotten a dime from them since I turned 18, and after college (paid for with scholarships/by working 3 jobs) I was told I was not allowed to move back home because I would be a ‘bad influence’ on my brothers (meanwhile my secretly-OTD little brother is 27, has a job that pays better than mine, and still lives at home rent-free because he was/is better at keeping secrets and lying than I was). When I married someone who isn’t jewish they told me I’m not welcome to come home even to visit, that we can “no longer have a relationship” and now I usually only hear from them when someone dies.
I am so sorry to hear that. It is hard for me to imagine ever ‘killing off’ your kid.
It is ok not to get money from your parents…you can make your own way. Just try to remember that you are Jewish. Remember what is good about it.
I am stunned that this still happens.
And yea..I came from a big family. Some of my siblings were really good at lying or ‘going to the library’ nearly every night to study.
I understand your point there.
Wow.
As the video shows, controlling, selfish parents cause kids to go off the derech, and then the kids are blamed. It must have been hard to break free of their control. I’m happy that you were able to “come out”.
What relationship does the lifestyle depicted as “ideal” have anything to do with Judaism?
I don’t understand your question! Does it really need to be explained what is so ideal about smoking cigs and wearing knit yarmulka? My own little slice of Heaven!
classic…I guess OTD kids die from smoking while brochers in Yeshiva can puff away and live to 120~
Of course, the Torah they learn in Yeshiva protects them against lung cancer!
Maybe I’m over-interpreting this priceless vid – tell me what you think: in real life, the OTD kid and his hippie friend don’t wear any sort of kippa or head covering. But the actors who play those characters are as frum as the guy who made the video, and they wouldn’t take off their big black lids even if it’s required by the script. The director told the actor who plays the OTD kid to wear a baseball cap, but that was still too goyish. So, as a compromise, they gave him a more inconspicuous kippah. Hm?
that is actually an explanation i can understand, not that its normal. but its better than saying wearing a knitted kippa is otd.
You’re correct about that last part, although incorrect regarding the frumkeit of the teen actors.
Regarding OTD, or non-Orthodox. This isn’t the only instance of Charedim portraying Modern Orthodox folks as being non-Orthodox. Take a look at this picture (a cover of a recent book) for example –
http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_Bp-yK_UHcb8/TMrXD1eRCEI/AAAAAAAAAZ4/WTHXbNDOdaI/s1600/BookCovernonOandO.jpg
The family on the left is the Orthodox one, while the family on the right is the “non-Orthodox” one. Guess what? They are also quintessential Modern Orthodox!
You know, the thing is though Mark that a parent who buys into the stereotypes being mocked here as to who is or isn’t properly observant is exactly the type of parent who’d boot a kid out of the house for wearing the wrong colored kippa. So it’s kind of playing to its audience in a way that hopefully the audience will be willing to accept.
So it’s kind of playing to its audience
Sorry I don’t accept the “playing to the audience” excuse for bad behavior. Would you also say that when a Muezzin says “slaughter the Jews” or “Jews are the sons of pigs and monkeys”, he is also playing to his audience?
Oh dear me.
Okay, let me not cop out on the “oh dear me” and answer you 100% honestly here, Mark. A muezzin who says “slaughter the Jews” or “Jews are the sons of pigs and monkeys” is not playing to his audience, no! He is saying something that is disgusting and incorrect. BUT ….
A muezzin who says “just ignore the Jews, refuse to do business with them, but don’t kill them” or who says “Jews are the sons and pigs of monkeys — but that is no reason to kill them; this is wrong” to a roomful of radicals Wahhabis being educating in some backwater madrassa in Yemen IS, indeed, playing to his audience.
He is saying something pretty offensive. He is saying something that ideally should not be a part of the curriculum. He is saying something that any reasonable, moderate Muslim should reject as ridiculous. BUT, he is saying something RELATIVELY more moderate than the “old school” lesson that his audience may well perceive as radical.
As mind-boggling. As thought-provoking.
That is really screwed up, but THAT muezzin — and I do think you mean “mullah” by the way — I don’t mean that in a snarky fashion, I just think you are using the wrong terminology here — HE is indeed “playing to his audience” to get across a “radical” message that will only seem “radical” to a certain type of person. The person who MOST needs to hear it.
I’ll tell you one more thing and then I’ll shut up, LOL. I can see this EXACT same video being made in Saudi Arabia. The only difference is that to show the kid was Muslim OTD it’d show him wearing a long thobe where his dad wore a short thobe. Or it’d show a girl who covered her whole body and every inch of her hair — just not her face.
A lot of moderate Muslims would rightly take some offense at the video, saying “this is ridiculous. Islam does NOT require a man to wear a thobe above his knees, it does NOT require a hijabi to be a niqabi, and this video is offensive for portraying an otherwise religious Muslim in a short thobe / in hijab but not niqab as OTD!”
They would be 100% right, but my answer would still be the same. “The type of Muslim dad who would kick his kid out for wearing a long thobe instead of a short one is exactly the one who’ll pick up on what this video means and will take it to heart, so I say it’s for the best.”
I can see this EXACT same video being made in Saudi Arabia.
I agree. Fundamentalists all over the world generally have similar behavior … that is behavior that almost always is geared towards control of their populace.
I agree 100%. It would be made just as I said with a long “evil” thobe contrasted with the father’s shorter “pious” thobe. This small difference, not even discernible to the outsider, would imply all sorts of horrible things culturally.
Agreed.
and I do think you mean “mullah” by the way
No, I mean muezzin because I heard the calls on the loudspeakers with my own ears (though it was translated for me by someone who understands Arabic). Though I suppose it is possible that the Mullah was at the microphone.
Maybe I’m misunderstanding the role of the muezzin, but aren’t they the ones who call people to pray? I don’t speak Arabic, but from what I hear, most of what they say can be translated as “time to daven”.
Yes, usually the muezzin calls people to prayer along with declarations about the greatness of God. However sometimes the muezzin uses his loudspeaker to incite the locals to violent protest.
Mahla, youre usually smarter than most people here, surely you realize that for some switching yarmulkas is going off the derech ie he is going off the derech that his parents hoped to raise him in, that is not to say that wearing a different yarmulke is inherently off the derech.
an imperfect analogy would be attending community college for some it is a great accomplishment for others it may be a big let down while for still others it may be the norm, none of tose positions says inherently what they feel about community college.
Is this so crazy?
BTW, even if “playing to ones audience” were a valid argument, you couldn’t use that argument for that book because the audience of that book *IS* the non-Orthodox!
I was only talking about the video, not the book. I actually just went and took a look at the book cover. :^) Just now. :^)
That explains why so many yeshivish guys wear baseball caps and think now magically nobody can tell that they’re jewish!
I like how not being frum makes you homeless and a drug addict
“I like how not being a penguin makes you homeless and a drug addict”
FIXED
The “bum” in the video is one of the best “frum”/Jewish wedding drummers Chemy Soibelman – Here he is: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cKsBvPzITeE
He’s awesome.
I like how not being a kangaroo makes you homeless and a drug addict.
Where does Borger find time to make videos and run the Boro Park chapter of NAMBLA?
ftw!
Wearing a kippa sruga is OTD in a culture obsessed with conformity:
Same shirt style.
Same shirt color.
Same pants.
Same shoes.
Same primary head covering (black velvet).
Same secondary head covering (black brimmed hat)
Same haircut.
Now, if someone wants to buy a kippa sruga, they got a whole crayola box of colors and styles to choose from. Next, he won’t wear the Jewniform no more.
Probably fictionalized, but this is the first scene in Pineapple Express: Caution, NSFW
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2h6cQrq_PXM
here’s an alternative version:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KCoowzEkVGE&feature=related
Another theory I’ve heard is that the biggest lobbyists for illegalizing it was the cotton industry. Hemp is one of its biggest competitors, so with that out of the picture, cotton was able to corner the market more easily. I dunno how true this is, but it’s a theory.
yeah I do remember it now. That was another piece of the story for sure; it also had to do with the fact that the most marijuana users at the time were black or mexican, so it was a great excuse to stick black and mexican people in jail.
Well my question is much simpler……where was the mother? Isn’t the mother supposed to be the center of Jewish home life. In fact, were there any women at all in the video? The absence of the mother implies that one’s life is incomplete unless both parents are involved with the raising children.
Other than that, the video was idiotic and too simplistic and probably one that is shown to elementary school yeshiva kids and keep them in line.
the only thing youve got right is that the video was “was idiotic and too simplistic ” Unfortunatly even that was to deep for you.
the lesson of the video was parents shouldnt throw out their rebelious sons, it has nothing to do with keeping anyone in line.
The absence of the mother is becasue frummies dont portray women in pictures video etc pick up a copy of yated, haamodia etc you wont find any women there either. youre conclusion doesnt even make sense
Mr. Anonymous, you must be the Frummy video King. I forgot that Frummies don’t show women with men in videos. For some reason, it just seemed bizarre not showing the Mom but of course my not being Frummy could explain that part.
There were two points to the video in my opinion. The point about not kicking out a rebellious son was valid. In addition, my point was that if the video was shown to early teen Yeshiva students, the message was that if you go OTD, a life of drugs, homelessness, and even death could or would follow. It’s very similar to anti-drug videos from the late 1950s….something you are probably too young to appreciate.
almost every teen has smoked, gotten drunk, been online ect….. and there parents have no clue. sometimes they never find out, and sometimes it goes off like a bomb. they have to remember that we are still thier sons….
Agreed….and daughters.
It’s funny, but at my local Chabad, when the guys drink L’Chaims and Farbrengen, a woman came by and wanted some scotch as well….which I poured…but our Rabbi later pulled me to the side and told me not to give her any scotch….that she drinks too much. Or was there something else where women cannot Farbrengen. Any insight you or someone could provide would be of interest. See attached video link of Farbrengen:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Btwu9VRIoJU