I have done some similar posts, but I was just thinking that I could kick up another interesting series of posts by thinking of pickup lines for each sect of the Jewish community. More like mixing stereotypes about each sect with some sexual innuendo meant to act as a pickup line if Jews actually used pickup lines. I am also curious to hear if you have any ideas for pickup lines and if you have ever experienced any whacked out MO Lib style pickup lines.
Modern orthodox liberal pickup lines:
You know milchigs isn’t the only thing I eat out?
The only time size doesn’t matter is when it comes to my srugi.
Don’t worry I won’t make you go to the mikvah.
Thinking of you and me in Riverdale.
I am shomer negia; shomer what I am negia.
I would never bring my tefillin on a date, I only daven when there’s breakfast in shul.
I hear you’re a doctor?
C’mon did you “really” come here to daven?
I was the hottest NCSY advisor, you know?
You were so the hottest girl in Camp Hillel.
I love a man who can quote Avi Weiss.
Let’s do it in the shabbos elevator.
I may eat non-kosher vegetarian out, but I’d love to try your kosher meat.
I may not be Dutch but, I only wait one hour between milk and meat.
We can be chavrutas if you like.
We’ll pretend we’re married so you can go to the mikvah.
We met at the women’s megillah reading.
Maybe we can skip the learning on the lawn.
Let’s get our yichud on.
I love a woman who makes kiddush and hamotzi.
I hear you make a mean bok-choy salad.
I saw you leaning over the mechitza.
I thought JOFA said women want to be on top.
“I thought JOFA said women want to be on top.”
lol
We do 😉
“I would never bring my tefillin on a date, I only daven when there’s breakfast in shul.”
Super!
“I saw you leaning over the mechitza.”
I swear I am going to use that!
“You know milchigs isn’t the only thing I eat out?”
So preverted and hilarious – I love it.
Can I do semikha on your Maharats?
Nice!
Loved these….particularly the first one
When is the “Things Left-Wing Modern Orthodox Jews Like” post coming? I’ve been anticipating it for weeks already!!
I have been trying it out and it’s just way too negative, like I can’t find anything positive to say at all.
We can take the negativity of the Leftwing-MO post (well at least I can 🙂
How about a Conservative pick up lines? Reform? Reconstructionist? Agnostic Jewish? Baal Tshuvah? Yeshivish? Chasidish? Comon Hesh!!
We’ll pretend we’re married so you can go to the mikvah – LOL
Ooohh my God these were soo awkward to read!!! :\ *face in palm*
Is that a mezuzah in your pocket, or are you just happy to see me?
very very good
SawYouAtSinai? Nah! I met you on FrumSatire, reading your pithy comments on the shidduch crisis!
Very funny!
True conversation between me and Modern Orthodox Liberal on Frumster:
“I’ll pick you up in my car. Then, you can suck on my stick shift…”
“But it’s assur.”
“Stop preaching. You think you’re so frum…”