In the Bay Area I am constantly the only FFB (frum from birth) person at meals and other Jewish events I go to. So in my search for FFB’s I have developed several techniques to spotting and weeding out the FFB’s. It’s not the easiest thing to do, since most of it involves table manners, or lack of them, or the types of food and food practices they enjoy. For instance, I can tell someone is an FFB based on the fact they ordered a nice peace of meat well done, love moscato diasti or don’t immediately place their napkin on their laps right after kiddush.Spotting BT’s is so much easier!
Ways to spot FFB’s in places where they are hard to find:
They come into shul late and immediately daven mincha without a siddur or saying ashrei first.
They go through a whole shabbos lunch without touching their napkin, let alone placing it on their lap right after washing.
If entering shul during kedusha, they stop right in their tracks rather than walking to their seat
They mutter ya’ale vayavo out loud to remind everyone around them to say it
They jump for joy at the sight of moscato diasti in a blue bottle (especially in the Bay where everyone is into wine and it’s hard to eat a table with cruddy stuff)
They say something non-politically correct out loud (BT’s are hush-hush about stuff like eating non-organically grown rice)
They serve soda at their meals.
They call junk food – nosh!
They make constant references to the craziness of San Francisco without ever saying the word gay or lesbian – when referencing that aspect.
They are talking during shul, learning during laining and always looking at whoever comes in. (they are bored)
They are comfortable enough to pace back forth in the back of the shul during davening (such a hocker thing to do)
They things like “our minhag is”
They don’t have PhD’s (it seems like everyone else does)
They usually work in Kiruv and if not – you wonder what they ran away from on the east coast.
They make a reservation for 15 at the restaurant I work at and all order well done burgers.
They make good cholent.
They don’t eat vegetables – beyond potatoes.(unless they are modern orthodox or something)
They serve cake at the main meal and call it kugel.
They never say chavorai when benching with a mezumen. (it’s very un-PC not to include the ladies you know)
They clop the bimah when something extra needs to be said (In some of the BT filled shuls no one does it)
They are either really dressed up or really dressed down.
LAME
“They go through a whole shabbos lunch without touching their napkin…”
Umm, would you please explain this; I am clueless as to what it implies. Thanks. hg
It means they are Chazzers.
http://www.hebrew4christians.com/Glossary/Yiddish_Words/yiddish_words.html
its not FFBs, its tri-state area FFBs…
outside of NY/NJ this doesnt fly…
Agree x 1,000,000.
its not FFBs, its tri-state area FFBs…
outside of NY/NJ this doesnt fly…
Yeah, I think that’s correct. But still, a lot of NY/NJ behavior/attitude leaks into the “Out of town”.
Either way, after a few years of yeshiva, they’re basically all the same.
Definitely the truth. And it takes more than “a few years of yeshiva” to knock the behavior and attitude out of an Out-of-Towner. I was in yeshiva for a number of years and have lived in the tri-state area for even more years, and still haven’t done one of the aforementioned items that Heshy listed. Well, except for the kedusha thing.. I’m still not sure what the halacha is regarding walking to one’s seat… Anyone?With a source please 🙂
Buddy, there’s “Out of Town” and then there’s “Out of Town”. For someone from Seattle or the like, getting heavily influenced is less likely. But for guys from places like Baltimore, Chicago, or Cleveland – which have their own Yeshivish nucleus, it’s just a matter of time before you can hardly tell them from a classic Lakewood Cheder product.
Well, maybe not a Cheder product, (you can always tell them from the second they open their mouths, no matter who they are or how far they are from Lakewood), but at least like the basic Tri-state prototype.
In a woman-friendly zimmun, it’s “chavrotai,” not “chavorai.” Like rabbotai, chavrotai. Just ftr.
half the things u said on there are hoiterish, not ffb at all
half the things u said on there are hoiterish, not ffb at all
Don’t forget quickly saying kiddush to oneself before drinking the scotch after davening.
Also, making faces and hand gestures during the Rabbi’s “speech” because “the Rabbi doesn’t know anything”.
And remember, “blended whiskey” is what you get when you pour all the partially consumed bottles brought by chiyuvim into one bottle.
+1 Thanks for including me in this description.
That’s crap and you know it!!!! There are plenty of FFB with PHD’s! You are a true jew hater !!!!! ok I’ll calm down now…
Not really. There are almost no frum Jews in graduate PhD programs. And no, “psychology” doesn’t count.
Really? I know several at several schools (not YU or Touro).
> There are almost no frum Jews in graduate PhD programs.
There are almost no frum Jews. Of course there are similarly few frum Jews in PhD programs.
> And no, “psychology” doesn’t count.
Why not? What fields, in your opinion, “count?”
That is absurd. I am sure the number of frum jews with PHds is far higher that our percentage in the general population.
It just looks like less because we dwarf our percentage in the fields that actually make money.
And the intellectuals are happy to learn torah which is even a mitzva, instead of wasting time studying literature and what garbage.
Of course there’s frum Jews with PhDs, Brooklyn College needs professors!
why exactly does a PHD not in Psychology count? Do you have any idea what that entails?
why exactly does a PHD in Psychology not count? Do you have any idea what that entails?
completely disagree about the table manners, but i am ffb so it would be strange if i agreed with that!
its definitely true that ffb’s are able to easily multitask in shul during davening and laining. i don’t think they (we) are bored, i think its just because the whole shul process is second nature to ffbs, can you breath while checking out who’s entering and leaving shul? well, we can daven while doing these things…
i was born frum, was frum my whole life, never veered off the derech, and i do not order burgers well done. my minhag is to eat my burger medium-rare.
Nope, sorry, I’ve never seen an FFB use thier napkin!
Right on the mark
you can make alot of money if you started writing and selling ebooks
If they don’t like the shul rabbi they will conspicuously read something during his speech.
That’s funny about the Moscato Diasti (Bartenura)….our local Ralph’s grocery store (a SoCal or west coast chain) sold all of their Kosher wines at one point at about one-third of their normal cost and I bought a case of the Bartenura at about $5/bottle. Personally, not a fave for me as I like complex reds, but it was a big popular hit at the Chabad
I love that stuff, buts its not very alcoholic, maybe 5% or somehting, its like drinking strong apple juice or something..
I’m a Canadian FFB and only 5 of these apply to me. Nice effort though.
You should be able to pinpoint FFB/New Yorker/Yeshivish or not within 30 seconds of a conversation, or you aren’t trying at all.
30 seconds? as soon as a BT opens his mouth he’s nailed
very few of these apply to me. probably has something to do with my bt parents.
very few of these apply to me. probably has something to do with my bt parents.
A Conservative FFB will keep his kippah in his pocket while a conservative BT will keep it in his shirt pocket and call it a yarmulke.
—
An orthodox Jew wears his kippah
A conservative Jew keeps his kippah in this pocket
A reform Jew leaves it at home and calls it a yarmulke